Thoughts from the airport

*SIGH*  I wrote this the morning I left for BlogHer, but apparently the wi-fi connection was so lousy in the hotel, it never actually posted. Tech hotel FAIL! So better late than never, right?

I’m writing this from the Atlanta airport…drinking a cup of mediocre coffee, a man who needs to rethink his commitment to deodorant on my left and the poor frazzled mother of five youngsters playing wrangler on my right.  Did I mention that the Jonas Brothers are booming from the TV?  Stellar!

I have found the ninth level of hell.

The level directly after being taunted onto a trampoline and realizing mid-jump you HAVE to pee.

However, I can’t even be bothered by it.  I just keep drinking my crappy coffee and smiling at the thoughts of what’s to come.

This trip is so many things.

It’s an opportunity for fun, yet very much a business trip and every stop between those two.

It’s also another big scissor step into a life that isn’t weighed down by cancer.

I took the first trip without my kids in February and felt like I was going to have an anxiety attack the entire first twenty-four hours.

Yet, last night I was able to kiss and smoosh and goodbye each of my children with less guilt than expected and more confidence that this trip was a good thing for me to do.

Partly because I know that they WILL survive without me, and as hard as it is to believe, I can survive without them. In fact, I am a BETTER mom when I’ve had the chance to miss them.

I’ll get home and just burst into sparkly fountains of joy at the sight of their familiar faces.  I’ll think they may have actually managed to grow in five days time. I will soak in the sounds of their voices and be overwhelmed with motherlove so intense it makes my teeth hurt.  I will wonder how I ever managed to breathe so far from them.

And then one of them will do something completely jackass and I will sigh and get back to the business of being their mom.

But for those SIX minutes it’ll be utter BLISS!

Don’t forget to check out the new posts over at Aiming Low!

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13 Responses to Thoughts from the airport

  1. Summer July 28, 2009 at 3:52 AM #

    Speaking of airports and BlogHer (super lame radio talk show host segue), it was really great to meet you! I loved your panel and getting to know you in the post-BlogHer ready to get home to our loved ones mode.
    God it's good to be home, isn't it?

  2. Mommy Needs Therapy July 28, 2009 at 2:20 AM #

    Exactly! Before we even got home from the airport Rich was yelling at Noah, he almost got in accident while doing it, and I was muttering under my breath "is it too late to go back" and "why did I miss them so much?"

    And yes, it is still good to be home, especially after they are all in bed!

    • AnissaMayhew July 28, 2009 at 4:06 AM #

      I hated not getting enough time to actually have a good conversation with you. THAT sucked. But at least we got good hug time!

  3. AmazingGreis July 27, 2009 at 3:56 PM #

    I loves you! XOXO

    • AnissaMayhew July 28, 2009 at 4:06 AM #

      MWAH MWAH MWAH!!! Your smile lit me up every time I saw you!

  4. Kyla July 27, 2009 at 12:22 PM #

    That is SO true.

    • AnissaMayhew July 28, 2009 at 4:05 AM #

      the high actually lasted longer than anticipated. That's a good thing, right?

  5. jessica July 27, 2009 at 3:23 AM #

    you think that was hell? Allow me to introduce to something called, United Airlines

    • AnissaMayhew July 28, 2009 at 4:05 AM #

      Shut up! I read a ton of tweets about the UA FAIL…WTF happened?

  6. Jessica July 27, 2009 at 1:19 AM #

    I am impressed that you get to even the five minute mark!

    • AnissaMayhew July 28, 2009 at 4:05 AM #

      It probably helped that I TOTALLY lost my voice and couldn't yell at them. MUTE is a great tool. HIDE is a better one.

  7. Sarah@Ordinary Days July 27, 2009 at 1:12 AM #

    I totally agree about being a better mom once you've been able to miss them for a bit…I also agree that most times that good feeling only lasts for 6 minutes.

    Hope you had a blast. Can't wait to hear every little detail. :)

    • AnissaMayhew July 28, 2009 at 4:04 AM #

      I won't even lie…I was shocked to find that the bliss lasted almost 24 hours!

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