when every shoe can’t be high-heeled

There was a time when I used to be a pro at shoe-shopping.

It was one of my limited talents.

I don’t build things, I don’t invent things, I don’t bake things that I see on the Food Network.

But I can buy some shoes.

And then I had strokes.

And my feet were different sizes.

And one didn’t even work.

Did you know they don’t make heels for chicks like me?

So, of course, I had to mess with the lady who sells shoes to paralytics..

“I want something with a 4-inch heel.  Preferably stacked.”

Silence.

“Maybe a sandal with a heel that wraps Grecian style.”

“Ummm…..”

“Well, do you have anything that’s a boot?  With a heel, of course.”

“We don’t do heels.”

“Really?  How can you NOT do heels? I don’t understand.”

“Ummm, we only….we have…shoes for…..ummm…..”

“Do you mean that ALL your shoes are flats?”

“YES!! All our shoes are flat and are made with no heels.”

Now, being in WHEELCHAIR, it seemed like time to stop playing with this poor woman.  Who obviously had no sense of humor.  That thought I would actually wear high heeled boots. Brown ones with a back outfit.

As if.

Today, instead of making salesladies stutter with confusion, I got the shoes that were ordered special to fit over my leg brace.

Without high heels.

I had to learn to be glad that I could make shoes work at all.

At least if I know I’m missing the high heels, I’m not missing the ability to laugh.

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21 Responses to when every shoe can’t be high-heeled

  1. tiffany August 7, 2010 at 9:31 AM #

    Long time lurker here..and I wanted to share this and see if it might help. My daughter too has had to give up the cute shoes for tennis shoes only(she has spina bifida and got an afo in march) she also has 2 different sized feet that are 2 sizes apart…her little brother by 3 yrs left shoe fits her left foot perfectly and she now is to the point she can laugh about it and she has shed many a tear over not being able to wear the cute flats because she walks right out of them on her left foot and before we moved to Tx we didnt have Nordstroms….. But what i wanted to say is that Nordstroms if you have one will sell you shoes that are different sizes without an upcharge. We can even return them if we get home and something isnt right without a problem. They are the only store chain that will do this.They cannot sell mismatched sizes from Their Rack store though. There is a running shoe called brookes that will sell 2 different sized shoes also but they upcharge 15 dollars and are non returnable. I dont know if this will help you any or not but maybe it will down the road. I always buy Emily’s shoes at the big shoe sale they have and then the price doesnt hurt so much from Nordy’s.

    Much Love and Continued Success :)
    Tiffany

  2. WendyB July 31, 2010 at 8:36 PM #

    Count me amount the folks who think sitting in a wheelchair is a perfect moment to be wearing heels.

    WendyB´s last post…It’s Official- My New Hero Is Antoine Dodson

  3. Melinda July 31, 2010 at 10:02 AM #

    You should totally go out and get some stripper, pole dancing shoes – at least to wear on one foot, or get two different sizes and wear the pair 0-0 I have a pair I bought before I had the two youngest girls and I loved them. (Yes, I’m a freak lol)

  4. Jen L. July 30, 2010 at 8:36 PM #

    Your humor and great attitude are fantastic. I am so looking forward to hearing you speak at BlogHer this week. Seriously. It’ll be an honor just to be in the same room with you.

    Jen L.´s last post…Countdown to BlogHer- The Vlog

  5. Lucille July 30, 2010 at 8:06 PM #

    Seriously, you need to work on a line of high heels that work with leg braces. I’m sure that there are many women in the world that would appreciate it. (Maybe even some men)

  6. Kristacular July 30, 2010 at 6:53 PM #

    seriously. If I was in a wheelchair I’d rock heels like no other… I can’t walk in them as I find every crack in a sidewalk with flats and fall………………

  7. ThePeachy1 July 30, 2010 at 3:03 PM #

    Thank you for the awesome bday present sexy mama, today has been of the utmost awesome.. Love you

  8. Lee Cockrum July 30, 2010 at 6:15 AM #

    I used to know a guy who was a bilateral above knee amputee. He would ask the hostess in the restaurant if they could make an exception to the “no shoes – no service ” rule for him. He would ask the waitress if he could get his meal half price since he was “only half a man”.

    His amputations were from someone running off the side of the road, and running over him when he was pulled over, changing his flat tire. He still had a great sense of humor. I think yours is great too!

  9. Emily July 30, 2010 at 3:27 AM #

    I am new to your blog, but I love the way you write. Your high heel conversation cracked me up and I really admire you for having such a great sense of humor even when others around you may not know how to react.

    Emily´s last post…Birdies Big-Girl Shoes

  10. Kristin July 30, 2010 at 1:43 AM #

    I love your sense of humor.

    Kristin´s last post…The House on Teachers Lane

  11. ThePeachy1 July 30, 2010 at 1:13 AM #

    Seems to me, ( and excuse my brain damage here)… But if you in the chair baby you can wear friggin stilletos? Right? It’s not like you gotta balance in em, your sitting. I can wear damn camel toe shoes if I dont have to walk in the things.. Seriously Niss, just go out and buy 2 pairs of whatever fabulous shoes you want to wear. ( one in each size for each foot).. WEAR proper shoes to get transfered, and then once your settled in that chair, change the shoes. Think back to leaving your parents house appropriately dressed, and then slipping into/out of something way more slutty once you didn’t have to walk- in front of your parents, that is. I love ya, flats or not your still my smexy beastie.

    • Mom July 30, 2010 at 2:52 PM #

      and I am sure she did many times!

      • Anissa Mayhew July 30, 2010 at 6:18 PM #

        I would never, mom!! *watches out for lightening bolts*

  12. Traci July 29, 2010 at 10:58 PM #

    I think you could design a new line of shoes!

  13. drlori71 July 29, 2010 at 10:19 PM #

    No, you certainly aren’t missing the ability to laugh…or to make others laugh as well. I totally laughed at that conversation. And for some reason as I read te conversation, I could picture it being portrayed on an episode of Crank Yankers.
    Thanks for the laugh!

    drlori71´s last post…Not Oprah’s Book Club

  14. The Flamingo Room July 29, 2010 at 10:14 PM #

    Wish I had been there to see her face – “What? No platforms?” Don’t worry, you’re rocking whatever you have on these days.

    The Flamingo Room´s last post…To Fetch a Pail of

  15. Miss Britt July 29, 2010 at 10:13 PM #

    Wait – if you’re in a wheelchair, isn’t that the perfect opportunity to wear 6 inch stilettos and not have any pain?

    I’m kind of disappointed that you’re squandering this chance, Anissa.

    Miss Britt´s last post…What did I do to deserve this

    • Amber July 29, 2010 at 10:35 PM #

      My thoughts exactly. The only reason I used to be able to wear heels is because I worked in an office where I sat all day. No idea how people stand in them :-)

      Amber´s last post…Can She Sparkle

      • Alicia July 30, 2010 at 1:52 AM #

        I know, right? During a normal work day, heels weren’t an issue because I was sitting at my desk most of the day. I would dread “event” days though because it meant I would be unable to walk by the time I got home due to those damn heels.

        Alicia´s last post…Back away from the cream cheese

  16. Amanda July 29, 2010 at 10:11 PM #

    I will totally scout some black leather string and lace your legs grecian style for you. We’ll bedazzle, be-lace, and be-funkify whatever you got on them dawgs.

    xo

    Amanda´s last post…BlogHer- it ain’t about the shoes

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