seeing the world from my desk

I wonder what it was like to have my handicap fifty years ago. Granted people didn’t live without the medical treatments I was lucky to have.

I think of the limits I have and what I would have then, it makes me know I’d have very little reason to even leave my house.

Who would I talk to?

Who would make me laugh?

Who would drive me to keep going?

I like to think my family would be enough.

I don’t think they would be though. I’m a creature of contact. I need to feel the spark of others. They motivate me to better.

My family gave me a reason to want to live but my friends gave me the fight to do it.

I treasure the friends I have. For their magnificence, the glory of being in their presence, sharing their bursts of vibrancy.

How can I not adore these people and the technology that allows me to be a part of their lives?

I think of the possibility of never having that and want to weep at the shattering loneliness the people endured. They suffered. They were truly trapped.

I know as long as I can reach out and there is always someone there I am never alone.

That comforts me when I’m swamped with the memories and fears.

There is a world at my desk.

I’m thankful for it.


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3 Responses to seeing the world from my desk

  1. defendUSA April 22, 2013 at 7:54 PM #

    I used to wonder that for my Gramma. She had two strokes before she was 45. In her day, they used to send people home to die or sit in wheelchairs. I am happy to say that my Gramma lived to the ripe old age of 85 and even though she was lame on the left side of her body, she limped/ lugged herself around for years until she was 80. Things got tougher and she needed a cane, then a wheelchair. They did not rehab people the same way they do now.
    She didn’t drive after the strokes– but everything I learned about housekeeping was from her. She was one tough old broad. I miss her.

    • defendUSA April 22, 2013 at 7:57 PM #

      oops…I am sure she was lonely at times…no internet, but lots of phone calls and she used books and magazines, library to enlighten her. She would have loved computers!!

  2. Alexandra April 19, 2013 at 2:14 PM #

    Me, too, A. I began blogging b/c I was lonely in my real life. I am balanced now: friendships on the computer, and they’re among the best people I’ve ever met:; kind, encouraging, GOOD. I think that’s no coincidence, I think that I’m living in the wrong place, but out in the internetz, ARE MY PEOPLE. and every day, I at least once stop and think, how lucky I am to have found each of them.

    Alexandra´s last post…Son, Now That You’re 18, There Are Things You Should Know

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