the art of being nice

I went to the Type-A–Parent conference at a hotel in Atlanta. I spoke about the art of writing, telling others I somehow knew more than them.

I didn’t. No. I’ve just been doing it a long damn time and I’m just willing to talk out loud about it.

On a personal note, I come with a certain amount of notoriety

NOT because I’m particularly special, but because I’m EASY to recognize.

I’m Asian.

I’m severely handicapped.

I’m in a wheelchair.

You can’t miss me.

People often want to stop and chat. I always try to.

Now here’s the thing. I’m generally in some pain from my eyes. Noise, light and people can give me a headache. Being in a wheelchair puts at an awkward hug-height, so my face has been crashed into tons of breasts and armpits. I can have to go to the bathroom or be ridiculously exhausted.


And I’m a complete asshole at times.


I’m a nice one. Quite honestly, I have a lot of reasons to be rude as hell, but that’s just messed up. I give tons of hugs, I’m ok with people taking pictures of my crooked face, I laugh at bad jokes and smile like we’re old friends even when I can’t remember their name.

I take time to talk everyone because they’re important. Not “make them feel important”, THEY ARE IMPORTANT. The people that are best friends to me are the ones that are warm and lovely in a genuine way.

Not that fake, brittle kindness.

Is it really that hard to shed whatever protective emotional barrier you’re carrying and just be kind to the people around you?

I heard about people being made to feel LESS for race, size, financial status, social worth, all that stupid bullshit.

It made me realize that I was the one in the wheelchair, but I wasn’t the one truly handicapped.

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7 Responses to the art of being nice

  1. Rizwan Altonji March 30, 2016 at 10:11 AM #

    He is a man of few words when it’s not about flying , but he was pretty He has hung it up already in his

  2. Lisa Gielmuda March 1, 2016 at 7:57 AM #

    Once you permit those who are convinced of their own superior rightness to censor and silence and suppress those who hold contrary opinions, just at that moment the citadel has been surrendered. For the American citadel is a man. Not man in general. Not man in the abstract. Not the majority of men. But man. That man. His worth. His uniqueness.

  3. Devin October 21, 2015 at 6:59 AM #

    È preferibile fare qualche tipo di allenamento di
    resistenza come sollevamento pesi.

    Devin´s last post…Devin

  4. Andrea October 2, 2013 at 11:01 PM #

    Well said. All of it. Thank you for sharing, and being as generous as you are.

    Hugs from me – the annoying girl who will forever refer to myself as the Brooklyn pizza girl for fear of not being recognized otherwise, that’s bad, isn’t it? Maybe I oughta change that!

    Andrea´s last post…Weak at the Knees, Jo Kessel ~ book review

  5. ThePeachy1 October 1, 2013 at 4:17 AM #

    shit.. warm and loving??? what the hell? I must be in due to a grandfather clause when the requirements were easier, like “drunk and sexy”…

    also… potato

    ThePeachy1´s last post…You can thank me later!

  6. Laurie September 30, 2013 at 11:47 PM #

    Eek. Ain’t nobody got time for that.

    Really. Just, why? (Hey, I miss you.)

    Laurie´s last post…After Insurance & Sick Leave: A New Life at What Cost?

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