When I started writed in 2006 Peyton had just gotten sick. I blogged to keep friends and family updated, it slowly morphed into a place where I vented about the horror of watching my baby in so much pain, I could honestly talk about the good and bad of the life I found myself chin-deep [...]
I’m pretty sure I’m dying. I’ve had bronchitis since Christmas, I keep forgetting to take my night meds so my bp is wonky and Web MD said this strange mole is probable pancreatic cancer. So, it’s been real ya’ll. I can only imagine the lectures brewing right now. You forget your meds? Are you stupid? Do you [...]
There I am, laying in bed, thinking of the things that have changed in the past few years. The thing on my body that have stronger, things that have gotten worse. I think, mostly, of my kids in relation to these changes. How much longer will the weaknesses maintain before they just DON’T anymore? I’m [...]
Phantom limb sensations can also occur following nerve avulsion or spinal cord injury. Sensations are recorded most frequently following the amputation of an arm or a leg, but may also occur following the removal of a breast or an internal organ. Phantom limb pain is the feeling of pain in an absent limb or a [...]
I took a nap on Sunday. Nothing new. I take a nap almost every day since I had my strokes. YES, I WAS TOLD BY MY DOCTOR TO TAKE NAPS. BE JEALOUS! I slept hard and long. Hours longer than my nap would normally last. My naps are usually dreamless but not this one. I dreamed of [...]
When I was in my twenties I went out. A lot. I was up late all night. I slept late every day. My dinner every night was most people’s breakfast. We used to have a joke that we watched the sunrise often, but only before we went to bed. I’ve always been a night owl. [...]
When it hit me what the date was I took a deep breath. 3 years ago I had two stokes that nearly killed me. 3 years and I’m still alive. 3 years since the last time I walked. 3 years since since I picked up my phone with my right hand. 3 years since I [...]
I’ll always be the cancer person. That’s ok. But that’s part of the reason I stopped writing at Peyton’s site. I wanted to have more to me than just being known as the mom of a cancer patient. That’s part of the blog name “Free Anissa”. It wasn’t meant to imply that I come cheap. I DO have my [...]
There’s a clock I hear in the back of my head that counts down TICK TICK TICK. The one that looks at my kids and sees them growing and changing every day. They were just babies yesterday. TICK. Our situation may be it’s own flavor of complicated but this spring Peter and I will have [...]
There were some bloggers that felt anxious coming to the NonCon even though it was a much smaller event by anyone’s standards. Less people. No expectations. The invite to come and just be real. It was still scary for some. Eye-opening for others. An experience that was different for all. Maybe it’s because *I* am different. In [...]
I went the peer training for survivors of brain injuries. We are learning to help new patients with the changes they are dealing with and give them a caring ear whenever needed. It was a learning experience for me in some respects. I DO live a portion of my life in view of others. I [...]
Nights like this I should be sleeping. I fell into my covers with lethargy as my pillow. So tired. Dreams should come easy. But as my eyes close, the buzzing of my damaged ears turn into sounds that make my stomach ache. I can hear soft shoes shuffling in a hallway, low buzzing and murmuring [...]
In a few weeks I go to train to be a peer-to-peer visitor for other brain injury victims. My plan is to just keep going in and out of their room, changing my shirt color each time. I should be great at this. The real reason Jill (my old PT) suggested this program for me [...]
Erma Bombeck said something that pretty much defines my approach to life.... "When I stand before God at the end of my life, I would hope that I would not have a single bit of talent left, and I could say, "I used everything you gave me." If you switch the word TALENT for LOVE or LAUGHTER or HAPPINESS....it still stands.
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